Unseasonal People

On June 4, 2012 I received a message and that message was "God may not JUST be removing someone from your life….He might be removing you from theirs, too". When I read that message it stuck with me, by stuck I mean I couldn't get it out of my head.  I’ve always prided myself on trying to be the best version of me. I was raised that way. We are firm believers that no matter what you decide to do with your life, the most important thing is to be the best at what you’re doing. They’ve taught me to give 100%, they also taught me not to settle for mediocrity from myself or others.  In recent weeks I’ve been thinking about that, settling for mediocrity bit. I found out that I had been doing exactly that in one particular aspect of my life. Friendships. I was letting people in my life that did not share my personal, moral or spiritual values, not only did some of them not share them they lacked their own. This can cause problems when it comes down to how they handle certain situations and how they treat people.
I took a few days to reflect on things and pray. I asked God to continue guiding me in the areas of my life that I’ve been working on: weight loss and career to name a couple. I also asked God to reveal and remove any people that were not right for my life and the direction that I am headed, which is up.  I “disconnected” for a few days and in those few days the conduct of one person in particular was very troubling to my spirit.  I prayed about it and the answer that I received was the people who are supposed to stay in your life will be known to you and those that are not supposed to be in your life will be removed. That happened quicker than I thought. Within a matter of days a certain person’s true nature was revealed and what I perceived to have been a friendship quickly deteriorated and revealed its true nature through a series of emails and voice messages I received. Both sets of messages were very mercurial in nature and frequently switched between anger and apology. Needless to say this caused me great concern and I had only one option, dissolve the friendship. I didn’t even have to think twice about it and have no reservations about it and immediately felt calm in my spirit afterwards.  I also thought back to the message I received and I feel that perhaps I was being removed from that person’s life as well.

This posting will be the only one that I refer to this particular instance as I am taking the advice of the ever fabulous, always insightful Marshawn Evans and “Releasing forever what God has already removed”. Last night Marshawn's twitter feed was like a direct message for me (although I'm sure many others gained needful insight from it as well).  She specifically spoke about what she refers to as Unseasonal People. These are people who are in your life for a particular purpose, whose time is up!  She spoke about the struggles of releasing people and things that are no longer serving positive purposes in your life and that we are responsible for whose words we allow to take root in our life. I was immediately taken back to the words of one of my friend's mother who always says, "Thoughts are things, words have power. When you allow someone to speak things to you they bring certain things in your life and those things aren't always good". 

If you are constantly listening to someones negative statements, the vitriol they spew about others and just the general disappointment and unhappiness they have in their lives, you have to take ownership for continuing to allow that person space in your life. You have to take the responsibility and show them the door out of your life.  It’s easier said than done for some but as my Grandmother would say “what’s necessary baby, ain’t always what’s easy”. This was necessary and now it’s done and I’m moving on.  I’m ever thankful for all the blessings I receive, for my loving family and faithful friends.  If you have someone in your life that you know is no longer serving a purpose for good, it's time to wish them well and move ahead without them.



Arrivederci!

1 time at Boot Camp...

So.... I let Sabrina (who I will be disowning as a member of my family momentarily) talk me in to going to a fitness boot camp with her this morning. Considering that I've never been a fan of traditional workouts - sports are more my thing - I asked her what I should expect.  She said, "well..you know. A little of this, a bit of that. Some jumping jacks, going up and down stairs a few times". I'm like cool this doesn't sound too intense. BULLSHIT! I almost died.

Seriously, I have never been in tears during a workout until today.  Everything ached immediately after.  Usually it's the next day when you start to feel the pain. Nope, not here. It was instant! My butt was hurting from the stationary bike. Those seats are uncomfortable. If any of you work or know someone at these manufacturers please let them know those seats require more cushion. I got home and pulled my pants down and what do you know, I have a bruise on my butt.  Next, my face was hurting, my whole face. My nose felt like I had been punched in it. My cheeks were burning, my head was aching.

To make things worse, the guy running the boot camp kept coming over to me talking about, "You can do it!" I'm like, look here you skinny asshole I CAN'T DO IT.  He yells "run, run". I wanted to slap him in the face and tell him I only run when I'm being chased.  I was doing sit ups and he's like OK, we're getting warmed up just 3 more sets of 30.  In my mind I'm telling my self, "you can do this girl, your ancestors picked cotton in the south during slavery and you're complaining about a little workout". That didn't help either. I started praying and then I grabbed my towel and cover my face. I'm sure everyone thought I was wiping all the sweat from it but I was really crying. Crying because I was exhausted, I was mad at myself for being fat in the first place and I was really mad at Sabrina for forcing me to get up at 6am on a Saturday and exercise!

This was one of the most intense workouts ever.  You know Jackie Warner from Bravo? This man must have been trained by her because this was no joke. And then his skinny ass didn't even do the workout. He was just telling us what to do. I have half a mind to take a jujitsu class just so I can go back to that gym and kick his ass.

I.THOUGHT.I.WAS.GOING.TO.DIE!! My family says I'm exaggerating but it's true. I've only felt like I was going to die once before in my life.  And guess what? I was going to die (or as my 5 year old nephew would say, I was finna bout to die!). So I'm being serious here. I have never sweated so much in my life.  I was a shaky, achy mess when I left that gym. People say being fat will kill you but getting unfat will surely kill you too.  I take Zumba 3 times a week and I've taken Billy Blanks' TaeBo and none of that shit has ever had me feeling like this.  I came in my house and collapsed on the floor. I barely had enough energy to stand. Gross as it may sound, I kind of wish that I had a catheter because I didn't have the energy to get off the floor and go to the bathroom. How I even have the strength to type this is a wonder to me.

I'll be back at it again next week, because Sabrina (who is no longer related to me) decided she'd gift me a month of boot camp work outs. So this may be one of the last posts I ever publish.

Arrivederci.

Comfortable in your skin (at any weight)

It doesn’t matter if you’re 100 pounds or 500 pounds if you don’t love yourself you will not be happy at any weight.  I know I will never be “skinny” and I didn’t make this lifestyle change over the past year to get to skinny (I’d have to lose a whole lot more weight to be skinny – and I don’t want to be, so there!).  I did it to be healthy.  So many people’s happiness is tied to some arbitrary number on a scale or an arbitrary number sewn to the inside of a garment.  We look in fashion magazines and on television are constantly bombarded with images of super thin people and some folks think that’s how they’re supposed to look.

I’m sure there are people that enjoy being thin just as there are people that enjoy being larger.  If your self-worth and happiness is directly related to your weight then baby, you need some help.  I know super thin people; I mean less than 100 pounds who are anything but healthy. They smoke cigarettes, eat all types of junk food and some of those people are even doing cocaine. So if that’s what it takes to be thin then I’ll keep these extra pounds.

You have to love yourself!  I look at myself in the mirror all the time and smile. I love me. I love my hair, my eyes, my lips, my hips, my fat rolls and everything else.  I just don’t get how people cannot love themselves.  We’re unique; no one is like anyone else. That uniqueness alone should be enough. But unfortunately it’s not.  I know so many people – large and small – with self abhorrence issues directly stemming from their weight.  It upsets me because I wonder if they dislike themselves that much because they’re a few pounds overweight do they hate me because I’m fat.  Trust and believe I’m not losing sleep over that though J

It all boils down to being happy in your own skin.  Happy at whatever weight you are!  I decided and needed to lose weight for health reasons and I’m still the same type of person I was 82 pounds heavier, nothing’s changed except my outlook on what I put in my body and how active I am.  At the end of the day I’m still Danielle.  So I implore you all to embrace the uniqueness of you and love yourself, all of yourself, every ounce, every pound and every hundred pounds.

There is light at the end of the tunnel

There is light at the end of the tunnel and it is NOT a train!

Exactly 1 year ago I began a journey. A journey that I started many times before and always turned back around. The dreaded weight loss journey. Let me begin by saying that I've never been unhappy with myself. I've always been comfortable in my skin. I'm not one of those fat chicks who has a problem finding clothes. I live a full life. I travel (and I don't have to buy 2 airline seats - not that there's a problem if you do).  I have to turn down invitations from friends to hang out because I just have so much going on.  There seems to be a belief that if you're fat you are sad, desperate and have no willpower. Which is NOT true. I go out dancing and going to the movies. I hang out and I party.  I was, however, unhappy with not being able to run a mile like I used to in high school. I was unhappy about having knee pain after walking through the mall. I was extremely unhappy about not being able to play basketball with my younger nephews and keep up like I used to when my older nephew was younger.

I've tried every "diet" - I use the term very loosely. I've tried the shit you drink before going to sleep that supposed to help you "lose while you snooze". Didn't work! I've tried the cabbage soup diet. Didn't work - had gas all day! I've tried Weight Watchers? It partially worked. I just don't have the time to dedicate to keeping a food diary for the rest of my life and counting points and calculating activity points. I barely have time to balance my fucking checkbook! I tried the diet where you drink cayenne pepper with lemon juice, molasses. Didn't work! I've tried the South Beach Diet! I should've just taken a trip to South Beach. Guess what? Didn't Work! I ordered this alleged wonder tea from China and aside from looking and possibly being panda piss it didn't work! I even spent a shitload of money and probably increased the sales of Frito-Lay tenfold by going on a - wait for it - a potato chip diet! Didn't work! I tried the Hollywood Juice Diet or as I refer to it the Gatorade mixed with crack diet. Didn't work! I guess you see a trend developing. While these diets may have worked for some people, THEY. DIDN'T. WORK. FOR. ME!!!!!!!!!!! I've tried everything except weight loss surgery it seems and I refuse to have surgery for something I can do on my own.

I found the magic weight loss solution that will work for everyone. I should patent it but I'm going to give it to y'all for free. It's called the "Get off your ass, step away from the table and exercise solution". Yes and it's that simple. Why I didn't realize it before is beyond me. I just had to do it and now one year later I've lost 82 pounds. I stopped eating fast food. I am a very good cook and run a small catering business so the reason I was eating fast food was out of convenience than anything else. To be honest most fast food is disgusting, we're just so accustomed to eating it that, that's exactly what we do - eat it. I started taking a Zumba class on Mondays in April of last year. In July I started taking a Friday class as well. I began eating more fruits and vegetables and completely cut out sodas. I drink mostly water and if the occasion arises that I do want juice. I grab a pineapple or an orange and juice it myself. It really is as simple as that. The waste from the juicing process is immediately thrown into the soil in the flowerbed in my backyard.

I stopped making excuses and started making changes. My overall health has drastically improved and I feel better than I’ve ever felt in my life. I still have a significant amount of weight to lose but I am happy with my progress. Since I stopped “dieting” I started losing weight and it’s been easier than I ever thought. I don’t look at the changes I’ve made as limiting myself; in fact, I enjoy food more than ever now and in such a great abundance that it’s unbelievable. I eat huge salads; I consume massive amounts of fruits and vegetables. I save money because I shop at farmer’s markets and have met a lot of people with gardens and get free veggies from them. I’ve learned to eat smarter, I’ve learned so much about eating for optimal health.  I look forward to exercising and feel weird when I don’t.

I hope this encourages someone out there who may have tried diet after diet with no success.  As with anything else you need to make time for it.  That too was easier than I thought. I used to live my life on a strict schedule. Time dedicated for everything; music, TV, telephone, computer, work, work at home and even baths.  I just had to schedule time for working out and it’s all worked out for me for the past year.  I’ll continue to update this space with my progress. I never really had too much to blog about that interested me that I thought would interest other but I’m so excited about this life change that I want to share it with everyone.



Until the next time….

Is this really happening

I started out this morning like I would any other - grab my blackberry, check twitter, check emails, brush teeth, hair and get dressed. Nothing going on so I proceed with business as usual. I hear the text message notification on my phone. Oh no Breaking News! Not just any news but Saints news! Before I even open the message I know it's not going to be good. I proceed with caution and open the message and there it is in digital black & white. Sean Payton suspended for a year, Mickey Loomis for 8 games and the worst is not over because the players involved haven't been penalized.

I know this may seem a bit dramatic but it's the God's honest truth. My heart started beating extremely fast and I thought I was going to pass out. To say I'm obsessed with the New Orleans Saints is an understatement. That is my hometown team and I adore them. I cheered for them when they lose and I cheer for them when they win (preferring the latter to the former of course). I am still in shock and have yet to read the full report but I'm sure that will be my bedtime reading instead of the usual novel.

I know that Commissioner Goodell has vowed to put player safety above everything else but that in itself is a joke. Football is one of the most brutal contact sports there is. Grown men are played to rough each other up and he heads the league so if player safety is his main concern why would he be working in the NFL at all?  The Saints bounty scandal didn't shock or surprise me in fact I thought it was a great idea. In nearly every field of employment performance is incentivized and I don't think sports is any different. Players who perform well on the field receive the best contracts, largest endorsements, etc. Why are sack stats kept and records given out if safety is paramount? Because it's not. Roger Goodell is a fucking joke!

The solution he proposes it to have teams certify in writing they are not running bounties? Get the fuck outta here! You are going to let offenders police themselves?! It makes no sense. I understand they need to make and example but I'm sure the Saints aren't the only team that had a bounty in place and other players on other teams have indicated this as well.

I guess I'm just so emotionally connected to New Orleans and the Saints that I feel strongly about this but I just can't wrap my head around how severe this punishment seems for a an offense - and I use that term loosely -  that is seemingly happening throughout the league. The league should set and example instead of making one out of the Saints.

That's all I have to say for now. I need a Valium!

Heartbreak as the New Orleans Saints Season Ends

It’s been nearly 24 hours and I’m only now able to mutter the words that are the title of this post. My beloved Saints ended their season with a dramatic last seconds loss to the San Francisco 49ers. Win or lose I proclaim my love for the Saints.

Yesterday’s loss was met with disbelief and tears. Yes. Tears.  I cried like a baby when Vernon Davis caught the game winning TD.  My phone rang immediately. My cousin in Louisiana was on the phone in tears as well. She said she didn't want to leave her house. I didn't leave mine, still havent.

With a family from New Orleans, it is only natural that I’m a Saints fan. The unnatural part about it?  How I turn into a completely different person during the games. I’m a carefree person…usually. During a Saints game I a yelling, screaming, jumping MANIAC. Win or lose I’m going crazy. I’m screaming at the top of my lungs and proclaiming the Saints the greatest team on turf.  I cheered for the Saints when they were losing for years and I cheer when they win. I prefer the latter to the former however. 

I woke up super early yesterday and got dressed in my black and gold. I’ve worn the same t-shirt on game day for the past 3 seasons.  It’s faded but feels so comfortable that I feel strange when a game is on and I’m not wearing it.  All this rambling is basically just therapy and is helping me cope with the fact that my beloved black and gold clad Saints post season hopes of another Super Bowl are over.

All hope is not lost, there’s always next season. I know this but it still feels weird. For months my Sunday’s (and occasional Monday nights) are spent watching Saints football that I don’t know what to do with myself once the season ends.

I woke up at about 4am and just began crying. Well at least the Golden Globes are tonight and the only thing outside of my family that can compare to Saints football is red carpet couture.

'Til next  time or as far as the Saints are concerned….'til next season

Happy New Year!

Happy New Year!
This year I resolved (again) to update this space more often. It was initially going to be dedicated to my loe of shoes but that just seems so boring to me. I still love shoes but I thought it might be a bore to people coming across this page. Anyhow, I expect this to be a productive year which means I'll have more to share with the people who come across this page.

Anyhow, that's it for now.

RIP Steve Jobs

Photo:apple.com

I can't even fully express how saddened I was when I checked my Twitter stream on the device that he created to learn that the great Steve Jobs had passed away.  He was 56.  Only 56, in today's times that is extremely young and he was another victim of that shitty disease - cancer!

I remember my first encounter with a computer as a child in the 80's. It was an Apple IIc, today it's a huge clunky old thing compared to the products that Apple is turning out nowadays but to me it was everything. When the iPhone first hit stores I was one of the first people to purchase it. The first time I used my iPhone took me back to the first day I used the IIc, I felt like I was part of this great and wonderful thing bigger than me. No, seriously that's how Apple products make you feel.

Apple has the best out-of-box experiences of any company. I mean you are almost as excited about the packaging and opening it as you are about the product itself.  Steve Jobs is a pure American Dream.  He was a visionary, an innovator and a creator. He took nothing and made one of the biggest somethings of our time.  His accomplishments and contributions will be experienced and appreciated by generations to come. He is in a word a GENIUS! I didn't know Steve Jobs personally but I felt like I did. I was at my computer to watch almost every keynote because I knew I would witness something that the world would be seeing for the first time.  Steve Jobs was a magician, clad in a black turtleneck and jeans instead of a wizards robe and hat.

My prayers go out to Steve's family, friends and all those at Apple and around the world who had the pleasure of knowing him personally.

If we take anything away from Steve Jobs' life it should be that anything is possible. I think President Obama summed it up best when he said this of Jobs: "Brave enough to think differently, bold enough to believe he could change the world, and talented enough to do it."

Misery Loves Company

In my post yesterday I briefly mentioned a bad situation that I would provide details here.  Well I’ve decided against it but I will share what I’ve learned from this unfortunate situation.

All I can say is that now more than ever I know that Misery truly loves company. But I don't want Miss Misery or any of her friends to visit me.

There are people that are unhappy with the paths they decided to take in life and the negative people they’ve wasted time and energy in relationships with and don’t have it in them to change.  These people will try to steal your joy, upset the balance in your life and bring you down to their level of dysfunction.  We need to pray for these people. Pray that they find peace and happiness and that they turn to God for direction in all decision making in life. This has worked very well for me.

These people for whatever reason always want to get their point across but not let you get a word in edgewise. This is because the truth hurts them.  I’ve learned that when people are unwilling or unable to accept and take responsibility for their state in life they often blame other people.  I am no longer going to let anyone that is having a bad day, week, year or life steal any of my joy. Life is just to short.

If you have a friend or relative that sounds similar to this person and they don’t want to listen or are constantly bickering with you all you can do is give it to God.  Pray for that person because on the outside they may be trying to put up this bad bitch persona but really they are a sad shell of a human being that needs help far beyond what us laypersons can give them.

I've learned that it's not good to get angry because you're only letting the other party win. They are out to make people as miserable as they are and nothing good will come of it.  Feelings get hurt, words are exchanged and sometimes relationships/friendships are changed forever. 

Today’s lesson: Let go and let God.

I Am From.....

After what has been a tumultuous few days I am starting to feel like myself again. The source of the tumult will be addressed in tomorrow’s blog post and tomorrow’s blog post only as I’m trying to address things once and move on. Today this space is dedicated to my oldest niece, Amber.  Amber - or MooMoo as we affectionately call her - began middle school this past Monday and I’m still in disbelief that this child whose diapers I once changed is 11 years old.  Amber by genetics like most of my family is extremely intelligent so much so that she still amazes and surprises me with each passing year. 

I was out walking at the park with my older sister, Deanna, when her phone rang. It was our sister Danae, Amber’s mother. At this point I didn’t know it was Danae but asked once Deanna started tearing up and then full on crying. She said it was Danae and that she was going to put her on speaker. I said “Why the fuck are you crying?” and looked at her crazy.  Danae begins reading a poem.  Not just any poem but a poem that Amber had written for school.  Now me being a poet myself this really made me smile and then like Deanna it made me cry. The poem is titled I am From and it’s Amber’s own words about where she’s from and what she likes and loves.  I was so moved by it that I would like to share it with you. Check it out.

I Am From by Amber N.

I am from a black walkway that leads to a big white house. I am from two picture windows and finely cut grass, I’m from a white fence that leads to our backyard. I am from Los Angeles the GREATEST city in the world!

 I’m from bike riding in the summertime. I’m from jump ropes, hula hoops, and home cooked meals. I’m from the computer era. I’m from iPods and flat screens. I’m from the new millennium.

 I am from my Mom. I’m from Denita. I am from Danielle. I’m from Deanna. I am from Decia. I am from Jasmyne and Chris. I’m from love.

I am from Christmas parties at Stanley & Sabrina’s house. I am from Halloween parties and trick-or treating with my aunties. I’m from New Year’s Eve parties with my family.

I’m from the words, “Oh my gosh!” I’m from the words, “I don’t know. I am from the words, “Not me!” I’m from phrase, “Shut the front door!” I’m from texting age. I’m from LOL. I’m from TTYL. I’m from ROTFL!!! I’m from tweeting… I’m from, “Amber it’s bedtime!”

I’m from a family that believes in God. I’m from a city that believes the LAKERS are the best! I’m from the home of the happiest place on Earth. I’m from Disneyland. I’m from Magic Mountain and Knott’s Berry Farm!

I’m from hot days, I’m from tank tops & flip flops, I’m from eating watermelon, I’m from cold days eating gumbo. I’m from red beans & rice, I’m from oxtails, I’m from black eyed peas. I’m from a loving family that cooks this stuff…

I’m from trips to Oklahoma City in the winter time. I’m from hot summer days splashing in water in the backyard with Dezon. I’m from trips to Disneyland. I’m from trips to the Grand Canyon. I’m from trips to Palms Spring. I’m from a family that loves me.

I’m from Los Angeles where it never gets too cold. I’m from hot summer days. I’m from cool breezy summer nights. I’m from warm beach water and a glistening sun. I’m from rainy winters that doesn’t bother me… 

I’m from a city where people sit in traffic. I’m from an area where people leave work and head to the gym. I’m from shopping malls and palm trees. I’m from amusement parks. I’m from the Hollywood sign and City Walk. I’m from the Griffith Observatory and the Hollywood Walk of Fame. I’m from parks and beaches. I’m from the City of Angels.

I’m from surfing the web. I am from downloading music. I am from going out to eat. I’m from spending time with my family. I’m from curling up with a good book and a blanket. I’m from shopping, going to church, and singing. I’m from having a good time with whatever I do!!!

I hope you enjoyed this as much as I did. 

Where Has The Time Gone????

So, way back in January I resolved to blog more often. Add that to the fail list!  Now it's almost the end of the freakin' summer and I've barely posted anything all year but I regularly update my twitter, but I guess that doesn't really count. I have not been posting regularly but I've decided I'm going to now since I've embarked on my latest and what I hope will be final weight loss venture. I plan to chronicle this tremendous anticipated weight loss on this blog and on a vlog (to be named at a later date).

Well, my birthday is just around the corner and my plans were to attend the Saints vs Raiders game on August 28th since it's in Cali. Fabulous - I know. How lucky would I be to have my hometown and favorite team coming to California the weekend of my birthday? Pretty damned lucky. It turns out that the saints are going to be practicing a quick 90 minute drive away in Oxnard the entire week. So you know who's going to be there. Yep, bitches -ME!

I can't wait to see Drew Brees and the rest of the Saints. This is going to be one of the best birthday weeks ever. I just love, love, love them.  Anyhow, this is going to be a pretty short post and I'm wrapping this bad boy up right here.

Arrivederci

When it rains...

...it definitely pours. This past month has been one of the most tumultuous of my entire life. I am by no means a drama queen and believe me this is not an exaggeration.  mid-October through mid-November 2010 will be remember as the four weeks of turmoil for me. It's pretty crazy that all the mishaps and sadness seem to have come to an end right around the Thanksgiving holiday.

So much has happened and I can truly say that like every year I have so much to be thankful for and it seems to be in the forefront of my thoughts more so this year because in the past 3 weeks I've lost an aunt and  another aunt nearly had a stroke and to top it off my nephew was in a car accident.  All of these incidents compounded with the other drama that happens in day to day life seems to much to handle at times.

So not only is it raining in my life, it's pouring. Pray for me....please!

The Holy Grail of vanilla cupcakes

If there are 2 things my New Orleans born and bred grandmother taught me, they are;

1. Don't trust anyone that buys frozen seafood
2. Don't try recipes you haven't tested before on guests

Well, I broke number 2 this past weekend, I hope she forgives me. A few week ago I was on the LA Times website, poking around the food section when I came across an article: 83 recipes for your favorite restaurant dishes. My first thought was, "yeah, right these aren't going to taste anything like the originals". One recipe in particular caught my eye.

The recipe was for those heavenly vanilla cupcakes from Joan's on Third. For those unfamiliar with Joan's, it's one of the best places for lover's of gourmet food in the city - visit immediately!  I was cooking Sunday dinner for my family and decided I'd make the recipe for the first time for dessert. A big no, no in my family since I would be tasting the final product for the first time with my guests. I decided that I would make homemade ice cream in addition to the cupcakes (merely a precaution in case the cupcakes ended up tasting like crap). The recipe that the Time's provided appeared too simple to end up tasting any good. I will be the first to say I was oh so wrong. I whipped that batter together so fast your head would spin. I popped them in the oven and within a matter of minutes the kitchen was smelling - to take a term from the Campbell's soup dictionary - M’mm M’mm Good!

Within 20 minutes I had the most beautiful vanilla cupcakes I'd ever made. I used the frosting recipe the Time's provided as well and the finished product was to die for. I enjoyed them and more importantly my guest did too. I plan on making them for my annual Halloween party with orange frosting instead. At 456 calories a pop I won't be pigging out on these. Although they aren't the healthiest cupcakes they are the some of the tastiest! I'm willing to workout to enjoy one of these. The recipe & nutrition information is listed immediately below along with photos of the finished product. Enjoy!!!

Servings: 12

Note: Adapted from Joan's on Third

Cupcakes

1 1/4 cups plus 2 tablespoons (5.84 ounces) flour
1 1/8 teaspoons baking powder
Heaping 1/4 teaspoon salt
1/2 cup milk
3/4 teaspoon vanilla extract
1/4 pound (1 stick) butter, at room temperature
1 cup (7 ounces) sugar
2 eggs


1. Heat the oven to 350 degrees. Line standard muffin cups with paper liners.
2. In a medium bowl, sift together the flour with the baking powder and salt. In a small bowl or measuring cup, stir together the milk and vanilla extract. Set aside.
3. In the bowl of a stand mixer, or in a large bowl using a hand mixer, cream the butter. Gradually add in the sugar, beating until light and fluffy, about 5 minutes.
4. Beat in the eggs, 1 at a time, until fully incorporated. Beat in the flour and milk mixtures, alternating one-third of each at a time, until each mixture is fully incorporated and the batter is smooth.
5. Fill each muffin cup three-fourths full of batter. Bake the cupcakes until puffed, set and lightly golden, and a toothpick inserted comes out clean, about 18 to 20 minutes.
6. Cool the cupcakes before frosting.

Frosting and final assembly

1/4 pound (1 stick) butter, at room temperature
5 cups (1 1/4 pounds) powdered sugar, sifted and divided
1/4 cup milk
3/4 teaspoon vanilla extract

1. In the bowl of a stand mixer, or in a large bowl using a hand mixer, beat the butter with one-half of the powdered sugar until combined. Beat in the milk and vanilla, scraping down the sides of the bowl, and beating until smooth.
2. With the mixer set to low speed, gently beat in the remaining sugar until combined. Increase the speed and continue to beat until the frosting is light and fluffy. This makes about 2 1/2 cups frosting.
3. Frost each cupcake with a generous 2 tablespoons frosting.

Each cupcake: 456 calories; 3 grams protein; 75 grams carbohydrates; 0 fiber; 17 grams fat; 10 grams saturated fat; 77 mg. cholesterol; 64 grams sugar; 116 mg. sodium.

2010 MTV VMA's aka 2 hours of television that sucked ass!!!

If you're like me and you watched the MTV VMA's last night you're probably pissed off. First of all; the ass clowns over at MTV - which doesn't show any fucking videos any more had their annual fake awards show. It was terrible. Chelsea Handler is much funnier on her show than she was on the VMA's. I doubt they will ask her to host again. Here's a quick recap: Gaga won everything and Justin Bieber got some shit at the end -LOL

The performances sucked for the most part except for Drake featuring MJB and Alicia Keys' baby day, B.O.B featuring Haley Williams and Florence and The Machine. Justin Bieber and his daddy (aka Usher) were the lip syncing king and prince of the night. I understand that they both really enjoy dancing but how about you combine the dancing with some real live singing every now and then.  Taylor Swift needs a swift kick in the vocal cords because that bitch can't carry a tune at all. Speaking of her tunes, that song she wrote and performed about the Kanye incident was - to take a term from the Kris Kross dictionary - Wiggedy Wiggedy Whack! Kanye was only slightly better than America's favorite blond haired, country victim. That red suit he wore made him look like an anorexic version of the Kool-Aid Man. I did love his song, I've been toasting douche bags ever since he performed it last night.

Hopefully, now that Kanye and Taylor have both sang their peace we can move on from what has now become the biggest beef in the music Industry since the East Coast-West Coast rap feud. And when the hell did Jared Leto join a band? Where the hell have I been?

My 2 cents on some of the fashion:

Katy Perry - awesome dress

Lady Gaga - avante garde and fabulously unique as always. The meat dress was a little weird but hey that's her style, she wouldn't be Gaga without getting a little crazy.

Ciara - the ostrich called and wants its feathers back

Ke$ha - wore a dress made out of trash bags which was fitting because she is GARBAGE

Usher - fire your stylist ASAP. Those boot with that suit and the hint of pink with the handkerchief - No, no and no

Drake - looked dapper as ever

Justin - looked more bad boy than boy band which isn't a bad thing

Will.i.am and Nikki Minaj - 2 words for these 2 - Gruesome Twosome (not the looks because Nikki is a beautiful girl but that outfit and fake booty are not the business unless your a drag queen from outer space)

Ashley Green - looked absolutely stunning (more than I can say for the other chicks from Twilight that usually look out of place and in ill-fitting clothes at awards ceremonies)

Jersey Shore - They're from Jersey. Just because your state is next door to the fashion Mecca doesn't mean any rubbed off on you.

Amber P. Riley - she's always styling on them hoes: fat, skinny, young or old. Go Girl!

Jane Lynch - This coat looked like K-Swiss made a cloak for Harry Potter. No, no, no.

Emma Stone - It looks like they used the rest of the garbage bags that where leftover from Ke$ha's dress

Pharrell - he is always rocking the homeless chick look. WTF is up with those medals he's wearing?

Selena Gomez - Dressed by Reynolds Aluminum Foil

Jackass - Trailer Park. Their name says it all. I wouldn't wear this to take out the trash.

Jesse Williams - He's so hot he could wear farmers overalls and I wouldn't have a problem with it.

Anyhow, I will just upset myself even more if I go on about those awards.

On a final note: MTV should take a hint from the Emmy's and Golden Globes and have the show live nationwide. Since the creation of Twitter these events are ruined by East Coasters who live tweet the show, but this show was ruined even before it started.

Arrivederci.

What a difference a year makes

One year ago today my niece Madison was born. She was 3 months premature and weighed 1 lb. 9 oz. The hospital said hope for the best but prepared for the worst. They even tried to prepare my sister for the unimaginable but she wouldn't hear of it and neither would we. I remember the book the hospital gave her about dealing with the loss of a child. I also distinctly remember telling my sister to throw the book away, being the person I know she is she hadn't planned on reading it anyway. We come from a strong Christian family and we knew that no matter how skilled the staff was that ultimately things were in God's hands.

Madison had to remain in the NICU at Long Beach Memorial for 3 months and finally came home on what was her original due date. She endured surgeries on her heart, eyes and a number of transfusions, not to mention being connected to all sorts of machines and poked and prodded day in and day out. It was all for her good but you couldn't help but cringe at the thought of everything. She was often times heavily sedated so she wouldn't pull out any of her tubes and be in too much pain. The NICU staff was amazing and Madison's parents got to visit her each day. The swine flu was in full swing so we couldn't visit her for a while, but we were provided updates and pictures daily.

When Madison finally came home she was surrounded with all the love a child could ask for and more. I consider myself especially lucky because I've been able to spend a portion of almost every day with her since she came home. She is our miracle baby and living proof that God answers prayers.

So to Madison, on your first birthday you dear sweet little girl, I wish you many more happy birthdays and lots of love.

I thought I'd seen it all...and then there was this

I have been to different countries but I've never seen anything quite like this. A one stop shop for hair, nails, tatoos and eyebrow arching - in the middle of the street!  It's Jamaica's Street Side Salon. I guess it's kind of like the places here in Los Angeles that are beauty supply stores, salons, jewelry stores and clothing stores that also sell lottery tickets. Major difference - it looks like you might need a tetanus shot after visiting the Street Side Salon.

A day with my nieces.

.

Well June is finally here, that means summer is just around the corner. I had a fab day with my nieces. We went to the park got chased by a dog and had to run home. Funniest shit ever, especially because the only time I run is when I'm being chased.

Madi got on a slide for the first time and her cousin was more than happy to hold her on the way down.

All in all it was a great day.

Sliding was a bit too much for little Madi, she spent the remainder of the day on a blanket in the shade.

This oil spill and BP's response (or lack thereof) has raised my BP

I don't know why more people aren't outraged with what's going on in the Gulf of Mexico. I guess I feel personally collected because my family is from Louisiana and I spend a few weeks a year in New Orleans and consider it my second home. I keep up with the news online from the Times-Picayunne and on a blog maintained by Jared Serigne. The pictures and videos alone are upsetting and add to that the fact that 11 people lost their lives because of a companies failure to ensure that safety mechanism were in place, this is downright right outrageous!

Photo credit: National Geographic

Photo credit: Daniel Beltra/Reuters

BP has a Twitter account setup to inform people of the steps they're taking to correct this problem which doesn't seem like a whole lot because all the oil is still gushing into the Gulf. It would be almost laughable if this event weren't so tragic. I took the time since the incident occurred on April 20, 2010 to read through any and all info I could find on BP.  I ran across their 2009 Sustainability Review and found three items at the very beginning that really disturbed me, especially because if they were true I wouldn't be writing this post.

Today I read the transcript of BP America's president, Lamar McKay's, testimony to the US Senate Energy and Natural Resources Committee. And all I can say is now I'm even more outraged. If you visit BP's website they go on and on about how they research prior to drilling and how safety and the environment is their number one priority. I call BULLSHIT on that because they're a company like any other company and we all know the number one priority is revenue! Well, McKay, said all the right things, but all I have to say is words without action are worthless. He seems to have a ton of questions too, the same ones I find my self asking:

First, what caused the explosion and fire on board Transocean’s Deepwater

Horizon?

Second, why did Transocean’s blowout preventer – the key fail-safe

mechanism – fail to operate?

Of course McKay and BP are not going to be taking the blame for this. They're trying to dump that on Transocean who they hired to drill the well. Transocean also owned and operated the Deepwater Horizon rig. and as McKay puts it "Transocean, as owner and operator of the Deepwater Horizon drilling rig, had responsibility for the safety of all drilling operations." If that isn't deflection I don't know what is.

This is a story of failure. A corporations failure to properly protect it's employees and the environment and that same corporations failure to have the proper safety protocols and redundancy in place to minimize damage and loss of life.

In his closing remarks McKay went on to say:

No resource available to this company will be spared. I can assure you that
we and the entire industry will learn from this terrible event, and emerge

from it stronger, smarter and safer.

It's unfortunate that the Gulf Coast of the US had to be the classroom that this lesson was taught in. There are thousands of people who make their livings fishing those waters, there are generations of people who have fond childhood memories of frolicking in those waters and there are those who where dragged kicking and screaming during their summer vacations against their will to Breton Island and ended up marveling in the beauty of the Gulf Coast.

The cost to the environment cannot be associated to a dollar amount. The damage is irreversible and will affect our planet for generations to come. BP better get their shit together and get it together soon. While the people of the Gulf Coast are welcoming, cordial and accommodating we don't take well to people mucking up our waters.

Dorothy Irene Height (March 24, 1912 – April 20, 2010)

Today was the funeral of Dr. Dorothy Height and I cried during every minute of it. She was a pioneer of the Civil Rights and Women’s Rights movements. She was fierce, stylish, classy and intelligent. She was fearless, a leader, a soldier and a voice for those who couldn’t speak up for themselves. She was everything I wanted to be.


I remember (and shall never forget) the first time I met Dr. Height, I was a freshman at Howard University and we were both attending the same event. I was introduced to her and this woman whom I had learned about in US History and seen on TV donning some of the baddest hats ever simply said, “It’s a pleasure to meet you, you’re adorable”, I was speechless, I shook her hand and mumbled something to which she replied, “Honey, speak up I can’t hear you”. We talked for about 10 minutes and headed to our respective tables. I would see her many times over the next couple of years and she always remember who I was and she always had on a different hat. She was always encouraging and asked me how school was going. Dr. Height wasn’t one of those people who pretended to care how you were doing she actually cared.

She would share her stories of the Civil Rights movement and always stress the importance of women, especially Black women, to carry themselves with dignity and grace – always! She spoke of the importance of education and how it should be accessible to everyone regardless of race and social standing. When I was in DC for the inauguration of President Obama it warmed my heart to see Dr. Height sitting there, she was a big part of what went on that day long before Barack Obama was even born. Her life was lived in service of others; she was always doing her part to make things better for the next generation.

She received every civilian honor imaginable and countless honorary degrees and where most people would have been haughty and snobbish she was always humble and classy. Dorothy Height was phenomenal, she was fabulous, she was caring and compassion. She was loved and will be missed.

No hat she ever wore on earth can compare to the crown she received when she made it to Heaven.

Dr. Height's funeral service is available for viewing online here.

Relationship & Infidelity Rant

The prospect of marriage is not only out the window but if recent celebrity break ups are any indicator it’s probably dead. Sandra Bullock’s husband Jesse James cheated on her. Tiger Woods cheated on his wife – numerous times. Sam Mendes tells Kate Winslet that one relationship isn’t enough for him and there are a number of other high profile break ups. Not to mention most of the women these men are seeing are far less attractive and much less successful than their current wives and girlfriends. Hello, when you’re looking to trade in, you should try trading up instead of down. There are so many people that I know whose marriages have failed or one or both spouses are currently having affairs. It causes one to wonder if monogamy died right along with chivalry.


I know plenty of men and woman who profess to be Christians and who made vows “till death do us part”. I have to wonder if that death referred to emotional death and not physical. Others will say if you aren’t happy then just leave. I have a problem with people not keeping their commitments. My grandparents were married for well over 40 years and while I’m sure it wasn’t always a walk in the park I’m convinced they were deeply in love with each other until their dying days. Were there ups and downs? Of course there were but you worked through it, you talked your problems out, and sometimes that talking would become yelling but you faced the problems – together. The husband didn’t run to another woman and the women didn’t run to another man. I’m not so jaded to believe that talking problems out will prevent infidelity but I know that open dialogue in any situation is more productive than not saying anything at all.

When people get married they should be marrying someone they love, feel they can live with and unfortunately die with. Too many relationships are built on lust instead of love nowadays. I know so many people that cheat and are cheated on and I wonder what leads to this and what if anything is gained by it. Sure, there’s the whole thrill factor but doesn’t that get old? One of my friends had an affair with a married coworker for over 3 years and bore him 2 children. His wife also had 2 children while he was having an affair. This guy had 4 kids in 2 years; his first child was born to my friend - his mistress. During the entire relationship he swore he never loved his wife, he planned on leaving her and constantly told my friend she was the love of his life. Now, over 3 years later he’s still with his wife and hasn’t spoken to my friend since May 2009, my friend gave birth to his 2nd daughter on December 31, 2009 and the guy’s wife gave birth to another daughter on March 4, 2010. Looking back on all of this I wonder what he was thinking? Was it a thrill, did he ever love my friend and more importantly did he ever love his wife?

One of my married friends and I were talking the other day over lunch about relationships and cheating spouses and she told me how glad she was to be married and didn’t know what she would do if she were single and dating right now because the prospects are so poor. I told her I was glad to be single because if I were married to some of my friend’s husbands I would have probably cut the guys throat or slit my own wrists.

I read a tweet the other day about how hard it is to date in today’s world and I’m starting to wonder if it’s harder to stay married than it is to date. So to all those married people feeling sorry for us single girls, keep your sympathy and take a good look at your own relationship cause the single girls are doing just fine and some of them are doing just fine with your husbands.
How many marriages end in divorce today? How many spouses have cheated or are contemplating it? This is a real issue and if it weren’t shows like Cheaters wouldn’t have so many viewers. Each time I turn on the TV or look at a news site I’m bombarded with facts, figures and articles on infidelity from everyday folks to politicians. It’s truly sickening. So here’s to being single for the rest of my life and being happy with someone who’ll love me forever – ME!